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Couples use E-nups to avoid digital distraction

You've heard of prenups — prenuptial agreements, right? Those are agreements couples make before marriage to determine who will have what right under what circumstances to which portions of the partners' respective financial and other assets.

Now there's a new version: E-nups.

E-nups are agreements couples make before or during a marriage or relationship to regulate circumstances in which they will use cellphones, iPads, laptops, etc.

A couple named Zoe and Kenny gave me permission to share some passages from the agreement they have been working on. Here's a section:

"The person wanting to use phone/computer needs to use intentional communication to obtain the permission of the other people present. If our daughter is present, we need to explicitly make sure that the other parent is willing/able to serve as primary caregiver."

This section refers to situations when permission of others present is required before using a laptop or cellphone.

But other parts of the document propose flat restrictions on when electronic instruments can be used.

"We will not engage with our phones or work on our laptops at all in the following circumstances:

During meals together

When spending intentional time together (e.g., taking a walk, going to an event together, cuddling in bed)

When our daughter is present

During movies, plays, etc.

In social situations (i.e., with a group of friends)

In a confined space with others, even if it's "default time" (i.e., car, public transportation, elevator, etc.)"

Couples use E-nups to avoid digital distraction 04/07/13 [Last modified: Sunday, April 7, 2013 9:19pm]
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