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You may feel compelled to carry a single-minded machete of determination into the adventure we've come to know as Black Friday.
In your quest to get the parking spot closest to the store, you may cut someone off in traffic. In your drive to hold that spot in line, you may literally step on some toes. In your zeal to get 50 percent off that item already marked down 60 percent, you may confront a store clerk with an arm full of coupons.
But on a day destined for big bargains, life and business coach Debbie Lundberg says power shoppers don't have to abandon courtesy.
"Enthusiasm can oddly turn to aggressiveness at different points in our lives, but certainly on Black Friday," Lundberg said. "How important is this item that you're getting? Is it worth your reputation, is it worth your patience, is it worth your composure? Or, is it really about having some fun and getting some good deals along the way while interacting with other human beings?"
In business trainings, personal coaching and as an adjunct professor at the University of Phoenix, Lundberg often cites acts of slobification that directly relate to today's shopping frenzy: failing to acknowledge when someone lets you merge into traffic; saying "I'm sorry" instead of "Excuse me" when reaching across for an item; talking on the cell phone while checking out at the store.
In her mind, they are all "slobified."
In her latest book, Reversing the Slobification of America, Lundberg not only challenges people to abandon truly bad behavior, but she focuses on those quirky, off-putting practices that have crept into our daily interactions.
Examples? Texting or calling and saying "I'm going to be late" after the designated time; texting in all caps; putting email messages in the subject field.
It's not an accident I cited three examples related to relatively new technology — because I think cell phones and social networking are contributing factors. But Lundberg says they are just tools.
"Technology hasn't made us slobified, it's just enabled us to be slobified more readily," she said. "There are a variety of studies that show people check out of conversations, meetings, interactions — even interviews — up to 45 to 50 percent of the time. What our technology enables us to do is be blatant."
I share Lundberg's disdain for many of her pet peeves — who wears sneakers to a wedding or funeral? — but on her website (www.debbielundberg.com), Lundberg offers a quiz that measures slobification, and frankly, I didn't score that well.
Clearly, reversing the slobification involves a self-assessment and an increased attention to the feelings of others.
The fact that Lundberg's latest effort is a combination and update of her first three books would seem to suggest that as a society we're getting worse. Apathy fuels such behavior and angry responses lace conflicts.
Lundberg, however, says all is not lost if we focus on progress instead of perfection.
"Are we better or worse? I think we're in the best situation to make it better," Lundberg said. "There's probably not a day that passes that you don't have 10 or 20 opportunities to be part of reversing the slobification of America.
"We all make mistakes, we all err. At the same time, it's what we do with the situations that matters most."
If you've yet to venture into today's shopping jungle, take a personal inventory and make a promise not to be slobified.
If you're already home, look back and make sure that when you put your head on your pillow tonight, you know that you behaved in a respectful way.
It is the holiday season.
That's all I'm saying.
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