Monday, February 19, 2018
Politics

Marco Rubio has all the traits of a newspaper columnist

He sounds earnest, bordering on righteous.

And with that oh-so-above-it-all tone.

There isn't an issue he can't attack, mock and then retreat from in a moment's notice. He speaks as if his fists are forever clenched, and maybe his derriere, too.

Yes, the clues are unmistakable.

Sen. Marco Rubio is positioning himself to run for … .

Columnist.

Trust me on this. I know the signs. The smirks. The sarcasm. The complete disregard of any fact that might get in the way of the point he is trying to make.

Think about it.

When does he lead? What does he accomplish? Who does he help?

Near as I can tell, he doesn't put in many office hours, has a hard time getting along with co-workers, and has few discernible skills other than a vicious ability to criticize.

In other words, he'd be perfect for this job.

Did you catch his critique on the bipartisan budget deal that passed the House last week? It was as if he was trying to scoop every columnist in the nation.

Before the deal was even completed, he was blasting it on Fox News radio. It didn't matter that details had yet to be released. It didn't matter that three-quarters of his Republican colleagues in the House ended up supporting it.

It didn't even matter that Rubio recently called sequester cuts "one of the worst ideas'' of recent years, and yet is now bemoaning a budget deal that restores military sequester cuts.

He has absolutely no shame, which happens to be one of the first indicators a scout looks for in a budding columnist.

Try this simple exercise:

Go to Google and type in "Rubio" and "criticize" and "Obama." You get over a million hits. There's Rubio criticizing the president for not lecturing Raul Castro at a funeral. Rubio criticizing Obama for not intervening in Syria quickly enough. Rubio criticizing the Iran deal. Rubio criticizing executive actions. Rubio criticizing Obamacare. Rubio criticizing economic plans. Rubio criticizing the oil spill response. Rubio criticizing Obama's golf game. I could continue, but I think you get the idea.

Rubio wants all of the attention with none of the responsibility.

Who else could spend months crafting his own signature piece of legislation for immigration, and then shamelessly turn his back on it at the first sign of pushback? It was as if he wasn't trying to solve this ongoing problem for immigrants and the rest of the nation, but was only interested in how it affected his own career and image.

This is why being a senator is so much more challenging than being a columnist. There are no editors around to blame all of your mistakes on.

Now I'm not saying Rubio the rabble-rouser doesn't have shortcomings he must overcome. For one thing, he's too good-looking. And it appears as if he spends far more time in the health club than at his neighborhood pub. Those are the kinds of things that are going to hurt him among the rank-and-file columnists.

But I've seen the man criticize. I've watched him bluster and preen. I've seen him twist, contort and duck accountability for his own words.

I'm telling you, the guy could be a major newspaper columnist tomorrow.

So who wants to tell him about the mainstream media pledge pin and oath?

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