At first I thought this crackdown on democracy in Florida, signed Thursday by Gov. Rick Scott, was mostly about Republicans sticking it to Democrats.
But after being flooded with some of the angriest e-mail ever, I see it's about more than that.
It's also about the certainty that Bad People (drug addicts, drunks, terrorists, welfare queens, illegal immigrants and, of course, liberals) have hijacked our democracy and they Must Be Stopped.
These Bad People are stuffing the ballot box willy-nilly. They pick up bums and illegals on the street, load them onto buses and take them to the polls, where corrupt and/or incompetent election workers let them vote on the spot.
This is the only way that Barack Hussein Obama could have been elected in 2008.
As one of my new e-mail friends explained to me, word for word:
When an organizer can pick up individuals, buy them whatever, take them to the polls and they are allowed to vote. Throw in motor voter and club wielding gaurds that are ignored by authorities. What we have is a cabal of thugs running the country with doctorates from the University of Chicago in thuggery and voter fraud.
It might occur to you that Republicans actually won the last election for governor in Florida.
In fact, Republicans won every statewide race in 2010, and won a two-thirds majority in the Legislature.
No matter. The state is rife with liberal voter fraud.
Something Must Be Done.
That's why the 2011 Legislature passed House Bill 1355, which the governor signed last week because he, too, is concerned about "fraud."
First, our new law cracks down on voting by Floridians who move from one county to another. (Critics say the idea is that the more mobile the population, the more likely it is to be Democratic — renters, the poor, college students and so forth.)
These suspicious types cannot cast a regular ballot on Election Day unless they have notified the elections office in advance of their change of address. Otherwise they must vote a "provisional" ballot — one that requires extra steps to cast, and extra steps to be counted.
I was amazed at the venom of my mail on this point. The self-righteousness, the rage — directed against what? Against people who move?
Liberals and democrats rant and rave when anyone wants to equalize the voters rights. For over forty years moving or changing a name, meant simply to updated your information on Election Day. Of course it meant no one could challage your vote, so you could hop around to any polling place, all without the dreaded act of respondability, the Word that liberals and Democrats fear the most, it means they have to do something, and its not free, or at someone elses expense. Yet today we want people to take the step towards respondable personal acts, as american have been freeloading for too long. So to you Mr. Troxler, I want the Governor to ink this Bill and let get back to one vote per citizen. Just like are fore fathers wrote it.
Next, the law cracks down on groups that try to … to … get people to register to vote.
Did you ever see Annie Hall? The scene where Woody Allen is eating dinner with Diane Keaton's family, and they are picturing him dressed in full, orthodox Jewish attire?
Same principle here. I see the League of Women Voters signing up American citizens to vote at the public library. But the Legislature sees ACORN workers dressed in pimp suits, handing out cocaine and bribes.
Third, our new law cuts back on the number of days early voting is allowed. (It permits the same total number of hours of early voting, over one week instead of two.)
Last, this law makes it much harder for citizens to use the right of petition to amend the Constitution.
From now on, if a Floridian signs a petition, his or her signature expires in two years. Any group trying to get on the ballot will have a single election cycle to do it — if not impossible, then difficult.
So, in sum:
Throw up roadblocks at the polls.
Discourage voter registration.
Cut back early voting.
Shut down citizen petitions.
That'll show them.
Whoever "them" is, exactly.