Friday, November 17, 2017
Sports

Tom Jones' strange, bizarre, goofy tour of 2013

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Today our year in review package slips into the Twilight Zone as we look back at the year's most bizarre, weird, goofy and strange stories (the stars of some are pictured above and below). We'd say enjoy, but if you enjoy some of these, you might want to get checked out by a professional.

Playing through

The first day of the LPGA Australian Open was delayed because a mob of kangaroos raided the course (above).

Those cops in San Diego are tough

Chargers fan Jesse Unger was tailgating in the parking lot before a game at San Diego's Qualcomm Stadium when a cop told him to stop throwing a football. Unger thought it was a joke until he was handed a $280 citation. When he went to court, he told the judge, "I plead guilty to throwing the football, your honor.'' The judge dismissed the ticket.

Let her fall next time

It's good to have fans. Unless they're out-of-control, squealing teenage girls who show their support by jumping wildly into your arms. Olympic-champion swimmer Ryan Lochte learned that the hard way when he tried to catch a fan running at him. Both crashed to the ground, and Lochte tore ligaments in his left knee.

Book 'em, Dano

Don't mess with 6-foot-9 University of Utah basketball coach Larry Krystkowiak (right). When Special K, as he is known, saw a bicyclist on campus carrying another bike, he knew someone was stealing a bike. He approached the bicyclist, told him to sit on the ground and then waited until police arrived. Krystkowiak's favorite cop? "I always just liked Barney Fife,'' he said.

What were they thinking?

A car dealership in Federal Way, Wash., near Seattle, promised to pay 12 people $35,000 each in a promotion if the Seahawks shut out the Giants on Dec. 15. Had no one in charge seen how good the Seahawks' defense has been this season? Better yet, had they not seen how bad the Giants' offense is? The Seahawks got the shutout, 23-0, and the dealership (well, its insurance carrier) is out $420,000.

Best pick for a burger

Briquettes Smokehouse in Ashtabula, Ohio, put a new item on the menu: the Weeden Burger, named after turnover-prone Browns QB Brandon Weeden (left). According to the food joint, the Weeden Burger is "smothered in toppings which we systematically pick off right before your eyes.''

Where was his offensive line?

The football championship game of the Central Intercollegiate Athletic Association between Winston-Salem and Virginia State was canceled when the Winston-Salem quarterback, Rudy Johnson, was beaten up in the restroom by several Virginia State players during a luncheon.

Did she break a mirror?

Note to self: Don't hang with Vi Ripken. The mother of legendary baseball player Cal Ripken Jr. has been held up twice in the past couple of years. Last year Ms. Ripken was apprehended at gunpoint by thugs who released her unharmed a short time later. This year she was again threatened at gunpoint but again was uninjured. I can't tell if her luck is really good or really bad.

The meter is running

Joseph Neubauer was fired from his job with the New York City Taxi and Limousine Commission after it was learned he skipped a day of work in 2012 to attend a Yankees game at Yankees Stadium. It was a makeup game of a rainout, but why was the game so important? Well, Neubauer said he hadn't missed a Yankees home game in 38 years. Before you jump on the commission for giving him the pink slip, it says he called in sick at least 13 times in 2010 to go Yankees games, among other issues.

Give him the finger

Arizona Cardinals safety Rashad Johnson (right) noticed something strange in a September game against New Orleans when he pulled off one of his gloves. Actually, it's what he didn't see that was strange: the tip of his left middle finger. He somehow lost it during a play. Johnson put on Twitter some gruesome photos after the game and then deadpanned, "Probably wouldn't have been used for anything good anyway.''

I got it!

Mattingly Romanin, a shortstop for Chicago State, was standing at his position before a summer league game during the national anthem when a skydiver came zooming for him. It was part of the pregame ceremonies, and the players had been told not to move, that the skydivers — there were three total — would miss them. I guess one skydiver doesn't understand the infield fly rule. He didn't miss Romanin. He collided with the shortstop, who missed the rest of the summer season with concussion symptoms.

 

Better ingredients, better pizza, broken bones

Lions wide receiver Nate Burleson (left) gets Most Bizarre Injury of 2013. Burleson broke his left arm when he tried to save two pizzas from falling off the passenger seat of his car. His car swerved and hit the median in a one-car accident. No word on whether the pizzas were injured.

Letting him down

Scott E. Entsminger sadly died at age 55 in July, and the Ohio native requested in his obituary that he have six Cleveland Browns pallbearers so the "Browns can let me down one last time.'' The Browns didn't provide the pallbearers, but they did send his family a jersey of Hall of Famer and Browns legend Lou Groza.

A dangerous header

Dusko Krtalica, a goalie playing in an amateur soccer tournament in Bosnia, thought he was getting a headache during a game because of a save he had made in which he fell to the ground and bumped his head. Later, when he couldn't move an arm and started slurring his speech, he went to a hospital, where doctors found a 9mm bullet in his head. The bullet had been fired into the air during a wedding celebration nearby. Krtalica, 51, recovered.

A trippy trip

Bonnie Jonas-Boggioni, an Ohio State fan from Texas, was pulled over by troopers near Memphis, Tenn., partly because she had what the troopers thought were marijuana stickers on her car. Turns out, they were Buckeyes stickers — the ones seen on Ohio State football players' helmets. "This little old lady ain't no drug dealer,'' said Jonas-Boggioni, 65.

 
Comments

Region football: Ocala Vanguard 35, Mitchell 31

NEW PORT RICHEY — The start wasn’t quite befitting of a playoff game between undefeated teams, but the end of Friday’s war between Ocala Vanguard and Mitchell certainly was.Like last year’s Class 6A regional semifinal, the Mustangs held a three-point...
Updated: 8 minutes ago
Region football: Green Cove Springs Clay 52, Zephyrhills 49

Region football: Green Cove Springs Clay 52, Zephyrhills 49

ZEPHYRHILLS — For Zephyrhills, Friday night’s Class 5A region semifinal against Green Cove Springs Clay was doomed by 12 bad minutes. The Bulldogs led by four points at halftime but allowed 28 unanswered points in the third quarter and were not able ...
Updated: 10 minutes ago
Region football: Lakewood 20, Jesuit 7

Region football: Lakewood 20, Jesuit 7

ST. PETERSBURG — Lakewood came into Friday’s playoff game knowing its defense had to help control field position against Jesuit. The Spartans (9-1) left Friday’s game with a ticket to Immokalee for a region final — and six Tigers (6-5) turnovers en r...
Updated: 14 minutes ago

Region football: Tampa Bay Tech 42, Palmetto 26

TAMPA — Another Friday night, another offensive explosion.Tampa Bay Tech’s offense continued its torrid pace and quarterback Michael Penix Jr. accounted for five total touchdowns as the Titans rolled past Palmetto 42-26 in a Class 7A, Region 3 semifi...
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Region football: Cambridge Christian 50, Indian Rocks Christian 14

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Region football: Naples 24, Largo 0

NAPLES — In a game between two teams that had never met with a lot on the line, the Naples defense came up with one of its best efforts against Largo on Friday night.The Golden Eagles limited the Packers to 117 yards of offense in a 24-0 triumph in t...
Updated: 25 minutes ago

Region football: Lakeland 52, Wiregrass Ranch 0

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Updated: 1 hour ago

Saturday’s sports on TV/radio

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Spurs rally from 23 down to snap Thunder’s streak

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FSU men roll in basketball; Florida beats USF in NCAA women’s soccer

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