Stephanie: Hey, Michelle. Michelle: Hmm? Stephanie: What color is this dress? Michelle: No. Stephanie: Come on, what color do you see? Michelle: I'm not doing this dress thing. I was up all night watching people talk about it on Facebook. I'll never get those years back. Stephanie: Blue and black? Or white and gold. It's so weird! Michelle: It's a basic theory of optical illusion. Science has a logical explanation for the divergence, about how your brain interprets the light coming into your eyes. It's always changing, so people constantly perceive colors differently. Stephanie: Haha, nerd. But what color is it? Michelle: I just explained. Stephanie: I agree. Who even wears bolero jackets anymore? Michelle: I didn't... Stephanie: Okay, close one eye, then close the other. Blue or white? Michelle: Don't you think this is just another distraction in the digital machine? Do you know at least 670,000 people looked at the original Buzzfeed post about this at the same time? Does that concern you? Don't you think that's indicative of a bigger cultural story about the kinds of things that move people to cohesive action? Stephanie: Taylor Swift said it was blue and black. Michelle: Do you even know what's going on with ISIS? Stephanie: I honestly think it's wrong to wear white to someone's wedding, so I really hope the dress is blue and black. I mean, rude, right? Michelle: Hey, look, your hair is on fire. Stephanie: IT JUST TURNED BLUE AGAIN! Michelle: Hey, there's a tiny man in a Hamburglar costume stealing your jewelry. Stephanie: I wonder if that dress sold out yet. I don't even like it, but for some reason I really have to have one. Michelle: Perhaps you're so excited by this because it is, in essence, harmless. It makes you just uncomfortable enough to be stimulated, but at the end of the day you're going to go back to your meaningless existence unscathed. Stephanie: I know, LOL. Has Obama weighed in yet? Michelle: It's blue and black. Stephanie: No way. It's totally white! You're so wrong! Michelle: It's white and gold. Stephanie: Wait, it just changed. It might be more of a green and pink now. Do you see it? Michelle: I see the end before my eyes. Stephanie: I think I see that, too! No, wait, it's blue again. Weird!