LITTLE PIRATES: Gasparilla Children's Parade
The G-rated, alcohol-free Gasparilla Children's Parade welcomes Tampa's pirate season Saturday. Pint-sized pirates 5 and younger can join the Preschooler's Stroll (1:30-2:30 p.m.). You will see elaborately decorated wagons on the half-mile strut, some with wee pirate ships and real smoke. There's also a bicycle safety rodeo (11 a.m.-1 p.m.), and an air invasion at 2:45 and 6:15 p.m. with the U.S. Special Operations Command team parachuting onto Bayshore Boulevard near Howard Avenue. The parade steps off at 3:30 p.m. with more than 100 units, krewes and dance groups, and the day ends with huge pyrotechnic show at 7 p.m. timed to music. A few tips: No coolers or glass containers. Bring some extra bags for the kids to hold their loot (and hand sanitizer). The parade is free, but you can purchase bleacher seats online for $35. The parade starting point is Bay to Bay Boulevard and Bayshore Boulevard, Tampa. gasparillapiratefest.com.
PRAISE THE LARD: St. Pete Beer and Bacon Festival
Local chefs and restaurants cook up their best bacon creations for tasting ($2-$4 plate charge), and more than 80 beers from local and regional breweries will be pouring at the St. Pete Beer and Bacon Festival. Try brews from Rapp Brewing, 3 Daughters, Hidden Springs Ale Works and more. The music lineup includes Twinkle & Rock Soul Radio, Damon Fowler and the Greg Billings Band. The family-friendly fest features bounce houses and kids zone, and leashed pets are welcome. General admission: $15 advance, $20 day of (food/drink additional); beer tasting admission: $35 advance, $40 day of (includes beer only); VIP: $75 (food extra); 10 and younger free. Noon to 6 p.m. Saturday in Vinoy Park, 501 Fifth Ave. NE, St. Petersburg. stpetebeerandbacon.com.
COMICS: Comedy Get Down, Lisa Lampanelli, Margaret Cho
Maybe our balmy January weather has something to do with it, but some of the best comics working will be swinging through the Tampa Bay area this weekend:
The Comedy Get Down at Amalie Arena on Friday brings comics George Lopez, top left, Cedric the Entertainer, D.L. Hughley, bottom left, Eddie Griffin and Charlie Murphy all teaming up for a blockbuster package tour at 8 p.m. Friday. 401 Channelside Drive, Tampa. $46.50-$86.50. (813) 301-2500. amaliearena.com.
Margaret Cho has had a varied career as a standup comic, actor (including on her own ABC sitcom All-American Girl), fashion designer, author and even singer-songwriter. Cho is working on her latest standup set with four shows Friday and Saturday at the Improv in Centro Ybor, 1600 E Eighth Ave., Tampa. $25. (813) 864-4000. improvtampa.com.
Lisa Lampanelli earned her nickname the "Queen of Mean" for her searing takedowns on celebrity roasts and on Howard Stern's radio show, where he called her "a brilliant comedy mind who'll steal the show every time." 8 p.m. Saturday at Clearwater's Capitol Theatre, 405 Cleveland St. $45-$55. (727) 791-7400. atthecap.com.