A John Waters Christmas: The legendary filmmaker pokes fun at the holiday season with adult appropriate humor that "puts the X in Xmas." 8 p.m., Capitol Theatre, 405 Cleveland St., Clearwater. $35-$45. (727) 791-7400.
Florida Orchestra Coffee Concert: An Old World Christmas: Under the direction of Stuart Malina, the orchestra presents Brandenberg Concerto No. 3 (Bach), Pifa from Messiah (Handel), Christmas Concerto (Corelli) and Ancient Airs and Dances: Suite No. 1 (Respighi). There's free coffee and doughnuts and a pre-concert conversations at 10 a.m. 11 a.m., Ruth Eckerd Hall, 1111 N McMullen-Booth Road, Clearwater. $24-$42. (727) 892-3337.
Holiday Lights in the Gardens: Stroll through the gardens with more than 750,000 twinkly lights, lasers, animated figures and entertainers lining the pathways. 5:30 p.m., Florida Botanical Gardens, 12520 Ulmerton Road, Largo. Donation of $4 suggested; under 12 free. (727) 582-5800.
Florida Conversations Lecture Series: Sarah McNamara: Historian Sarah McNamara will discuss the meaning of oral history and its importance to interpreting Tampa's Latino history. 6 p.m., Tampa Bay History Center, 801 Old Water St., Tampa. Free. (813) 228-0097.
River of Lights Christmas Cruise: Board the Yacht StarShip for a magical cruise up the Hillsborough River to see festive lighted bridges, shimmering downtown skylines and decorated Tampa harbor homes. Includes a holiday buffet, hot cocoa, cookies, carols and Santa. 6 p.m., Yacht StarShip, 603 Channelside Drive, Tampa. $59.95, $29.95 children. (813) 223-7999.
Tampa Bay Heralds of Harmony Barbershop Chorus: Enjoy a Christmas celebration with the Tampa Bay Heralds of Harmony Men's Barbershop Chorus. Special guest Main Street. 7:30 p.m., Palladium Theater, 253 Fifth Ave. N, St. Petersburg. $25, $40, $55. (727) 822-3590.
Celtic Woman: Home for Christmas-The Symphony Tour: The multi-platinum all-female ensemble performs music from their second Christmas album. 7:30 p.m., Mahaffey Theater, 400 First St. S, St. Petersburg. $57.50-$99.50. (727) 893-7832.
The 39 Steps: Based on the book by Patrick Barlow and movie by Alfred Hitchcock, four actors play 150 characters in this murder mystery mixed with comedy. ThroughFriday. 8 p.m., American Stage Theatre Company at Raymond James Theater, 163 Third St. N, St. Petersburg. $29-$59, $20 students. (727) 823-7529.
Sloan-a-Claus: William Sloan is back for a mature-audiences holiday show, bringing Christmas joy and taking gifts on the side. Attendees can opt to purchase dinner with the performance ($26), which begins at 7:15 p.m. 8 p.m., Improv Comedy Theater, 1600 E Eighth Ave., Tampa. $5. (813) 864-4000.
SEASON FINALE Survivor: Second Chances - Cambodia, 8 p.m., CBS. They came. They saw. They frolicked in their underwear. Now, one of the remaining contestants will pocket $1 million and be subjected to a lot of questions from Jeff Probst.
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Find recipes for the holidays at tampabay.com/things-to-do.