The words scrawled on pages in a red binder were chilling.
Found in a Clearwater apartment, the pages revealed a litany of terror and pain inflicted on a 3-year-old girl for several months, police say.
According to police, the personal journal was handwritten. Some entries were dated. The journal described a man's emotions and actions and noted how much he enjoyed tormenting the child.
The girl's mother found the journal last week. She read it and went to police.
Detectives read the journal Wednesday and arrested Adrian Paul Tate, 28, of 317-B N Highland Ave., who they say is the journal's author.
Tate was charged with aggravated child abuse. He was being held at the Pinellas County Jail in lieu of $25,000 bail.
According to an arrest affidavit, Tate is accused of repeatedly tormenting and maliciously punishing the girl during the past two months. The child is the daughter of his girlfriend, Nicole Frisch, 24, of Tampa.
The affidavit said that Tate kicked the child and pulled off her sheets in the middle of the night to awaken and harass her. He is accused of holding her upside down by her feet at least twice while she screamed and cried.
In addition, Tate is charged with intentionally pushing the girl down on a gravel driveway June 1, causing scrapes and cuts on her face.
"In his journal, (Tate) admitted that he enjoyed aggravating the victim, and he fantasized about being alone with her so he could "terrorize' her," the affidavit said.
Police spokesman Wayne Shelor said the girl stayed with Tate occasionally. Tate and Frisch had been dating about six months.
Shelor said an accidental fall was given as the reason for the girl's cuts and bruises, but her mother became suspicious recently.
"She looked for a journal she knew he kept," Shelor said. "She found it, and it was in his handwriting."
When detectives went to Tate's apartment, he gave them permission to search it. They seized the journal and arrested him.
According to Shelor, Tate wrote in the journal that he tormented the child out of jealousy over her mother's love for her. He said one passage in the journal read, "How childish I have been and jealous of the attention (the girl) gets."
Shelor said the girl had no permanent physical injuries.
Shelor said that at one point in the journal, Tate wrote, "I know what I do was wrong to (the child), and I've asked forgiveness from God."