SITE: A nondescript hotel room.
SCENE: A dozen very tall men, and one short one, sit in a circle. They are wearing ceremonial cloaks over familiar faces.
PENNY: Hear ye, hear ye. The meeting of the hidden will come to order. We are the 12. All hail the 12.
HORACE: Yeah, whatever. It's like I told Michael
DENNIS: Did anyone bring the doughnuts?
PENNY: Quiet. We are here to discuss Magic.
GERALD: I say we fire the coach.
NICK: We already did, Gerald. Remember?
GERALD: Not that one. This one.
DEREK: Coach Abbadabba? I like him.
DENNIS: Yeah. He brings muffins.
PENNY: We all like Coach Abbadabba. The point is, should we keep him?
HORACE: Well, no one else ever has.
PENNY: True enough. He's been a backup longer than Jon Koncak was. A team hires him, that team fires him.
GERALD: The heck with him. I say we fire him. Remember that 16-point lead we blew against Atlanta? That was his fault.
BRIAN: Yeah, but at least he admitted it. He apologized just like we told him to.
LITTLE PENNY: Can I fire the fool, Penny?
HORACE: Shut up. Why is this doll here?
DENNIS: (chewing) Well, he brought pizza.
RONY: We are playing well now. Shouldn't we keep coach?
NICK: Hey, who let Vinny Testaverde in?
HORACE: That isn't Vinny, Nick. It's Rony Seikaly. The center.
BRIAN: Yeah, Nick doesn't get along well with centers, right?
NICK: Who told you that?
DENNIS: (pouting) I miss Shaq.
NICK: I don't.
DENNIS: No, what you miss is free throws.
PENNY: The point is, should we keep coach? Or should we tell John to fire him and go hire Phil Jackson or Larry Brown or another big name?
HORACE: Well, when I played for Phil. . .
EVERYONE: (sound of groaning).
PENNY: Think about it. We're in danger. We're playing well enough to make the seventh spot in the playoffs. Maybe we could win a round. Coach is going to look like a miracle worker BRIAN: We could be stuck with him!
HORACE: That's right. You win too much and they take the interim off his title. Next thing you know, we have to run after practice. Maybe he stops being nice.
DENNIS: No more fudge?
BYRON: Can I say something?
LITTLE PENNY: No.
HORACE: On the other hand, if we fire Coach Abbadabba, who knows who they're going to bring in? We could have someone with (shudders) stability.
BRIAN: Yeah, we've got Coach Abbadabba pretty much broken in.
HORACE: This team is revolting.
PENNY: Well, not yet. But maybe we should take a few resumes. See who applies. See what kind of offense he runs. See what kind of defense he runs.
DENNIS: See what kind of pie he brings.
HORACE: What if Bob Hill applies again?
NICK: Horace, our coach was Brian Hill.
HORACE: Yeah, whatever. But when I was with the Bulls. . .
PENNY: Never mind, Horace. So what do you guys think? I say we give Coach Abbadabba a one-game extension, but we change his title to interim-temporary-for-now-'less-we-
VOICE FROM OUTSIDE: Room service.
DENNIS: Oh, boy. Lunch.
PENNY: Come on in, coach. We were just talking about you. Just wheel the trays over there by the television.
RICHIE: Thanks, Mr. Hardaway. And I'll be back in a half-hour to see if you need anything else.
DENNIS: Don't forget the dessert cart.