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DAILY DISPATCHES FROM TURIN

 
Published Feb. 15, 2006

JROMANO: There is a wonderful moment in the movie City Slickers when, after Jack Palance's character dies, they discuss how he would eat bacon at every meal. "You just can't do that," Billy Crystal said. In Italy, apparently, you can. Maybe it's because most of my meals have been confined to media dining rooms and the two restaurants near my hotel, but I am being fed an endless diet of pork, pasta and bread, including breakfast. Fresh fruit is a rarity, unless you're into peaches and prunes, and the salads would make a vegetarian beg for a medium-rare rib eye. I'm starting to dream about broccoli.

GSHELTON: I'm willing to buy the rumors about aliens in New Mexico. I'm willing to listen to every theory about the grassy knoll. If you want to suggest the moon landing was a hoax, I'll listen. But this one is a little out there, folks. Wayne Gretzky brought his dirty laundry to Italy on Tuesday, and immediately a conspiracy theory followed: The gambling scandal that has involved Gretzky's wife is nothing more than an American ploy to place more pressure on the Canadian Olympic team. Right. Because Americans just care too darned much.