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Spouse's escort days over

My husband, "Steve's," daughter by his first marriage has a mentor at work who keeps trying to "borrow" him as her escort to the company Christmas party. Steve and I have been married nine years, and this is the third time she has tried to pull this stunt.

I don't believe my husband is interested in her, but everyone at the company knows he is married, and for her to show up with him as her escort is highly insulting to me.

Steve agreed on the phone to go with her this afternoon and told me about it when I got home from work. I told him how I felt, and he immediately said he wouldn't go - he hadn't realized it would bother me. I told him he now "has to" go or she will think I am threatened by her.

My stepdaughter evidently doesn't see a problem with it, as she's the one who called to facilitate the woman asking my husband. (I wonder how she'd have felt if her mother were still married to her dad?)

Yes, my husband is a fun, entertaining person. Are my pantyhose in a knot over nothing?

- Offended, Not Threatened

Your husband may be "fun and entertaining," but he is also married - and that means he's out of the escort pool. He should not attend the function without you, and his daughter and her "mentor" were out of line to ask.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips. Find columns at

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