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FEAR FACTOR: BETTER-SUITED FOR GRADES AND ROACHES?

No matter whom you vote for, let issues determine your choice instead of fear. Yes, these are uncertain times, but I'm certain the greatest generation didn't survive the Great Depression and endure World War II by being afraid or falling for scare tactics. Besides, if you constantly live in fear, you're not really living....

Some folks say the school system should pay kids for good grades, but I have a better idea: Fine the parents of children who make bad grades: $25 for every F, and $150 for fight-related suspensions. Yeah, that's crazy, but parents need to share the responsibility for educating our children, and motivation should come from moms and dads, not dollar signs....

Aqua Net is great at killing roaches. A friend told me that the other day, and I'm compelled to get such important information into the paper....

Kudos to FAST (Faith and Action for Strength Together), a group of 30-plus Pinellas churches that have teamed to battle drugs, increase affordable housing and reduce discipline problems. The interfaith organization noted some measurable successes at its annual meeting this week, but it's the effort that pleases me most....

Seen on a marquee: A will is a dead giveaway....

Macy's Furniture and Mattress rang the bell of optimism in a recent newspaper ad by noting, among other things, that "life is great, gas is down 25 percent, more than 93 percent of Americans are working ... and you are looking younger and thinner than ever." None of those declarations have prompted me to buy a new mattress - yet - but I appreciate the upbeat outlook.

And you know what, I am looking younger....

That's all I'm saying.

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