Advertisement
  1. Archive

FAST FOOD DIDN'T MAKE HIM SICK, BUT UTENSIL DID

CHEW!

John Manley of Wilmington, N.C., has been feeling kind of awful for almost two years. And it was all because of fast food, his doctors learned. But not for the normal reasons fast food gets ripped. Seems Manley, 50, has been plagued by coughing, fatigue and pneumonia. Doctors eventually looked inside his lungs and realized there was something in there, so decided to remove the lung. "I said no way," Manley said. So doctors regrouped, and decided a good Plan B would be to just take the thing out of his lung, which was harder, but if that's what the patient wants. Turns out, it was a 1-inch chunk of a plastic utensil from Wendy's. Manley suspects he sucked down a stray piece of utensil, above, with his drink and never knew. "I'm a gulper," he says. "I gulp stuff. I always have." He says he plans to start using straws.

* * *

Police reports

Several people call in hanky-panky

Several people called the New York State Police to report a man carrying "what appeared to be an unconscious woman" toward a wooded area on Saturday. Which sounds like an episode of Forensic Files waiting to happen, so they went out to check it out. Thirty officers descended upon the scene, and the area was searched with thermal imaging equipment. After more than four hours, they found the guy. And the girl. Totally conscious. "Interviews determined they pulled over and were 'playing around,'" according to police, without defining "playing around." For more than four hours.

* * *

High visibility for dim bulb of burglar

Police in Northern Ireland say Stephen Frederick Hamilton was breaking into houses in the middle of the night, which is generally the time people who do such things do such things. Part of it is the darkness makes it easier for them to move around undetected a little easier. Hamilton was caught, though, because neighbors saw him. He had made it easier by wearing a florescent orange construction safety vest, complete with reflective tape. He was sentenced to 15 months in jail, and the judge called him "amateurish in the extreme," according to the Belfast Telegraph.

* * *

Don't surrender if cops don't want you

Carter County (Tenn.) sheriff's Deputy Richard Barnett responded to a domestic disturbance call. He knocked on the door, and almost immediately realized he had the wrong house. But before he could say, "Sorry for the inconvenience, sir," the man who had answered the door turned around and put his hands behind his back, preparing to be cuffed, according to the Johnson City Press. He knew the drill. And he knew police were looking for him. Just not this particular police. Daniel Taylor was found guilty of contempt and violating probation and got 40 days. No word on that domestic dispute.

Compiled from Times wire services and other sources by staff writer Jim Webster, who can be reached at jwebster@sptimes.com.

YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE

Advertisement
Advertisement