A bayonet from World War II. Satanic texts. A vest that looks just like the one Michael J. Fox wore in Back to the Future.
All of these items were actual purchases made after flowing drinks and lowered inhibitions, according to The Hustle. The online tech and business site surveyed over 2,000 alcohol-consuming adults for its “2019 drunk shopping census.”
The survey states 79% of alcohol drinkers have shopped drunk at least once, contributing to a nearly $45 billion market. Some of the biggest spenders? Floridians.
Apparently, this isn’t a new thing. A 2011 article in the New York Times said retailers like QVC and eBay often see notable spikes in sales during nighttime hours, and stores strategically target buzzed shoppers with late night emails for flash sales.
We reached out to readers to see if they had stories of their own drunk purchases. Hundreds responded across Facebook, Instagram, Reddit and Twitter.
Popular tipsy purchases include box sets of guilty pleasure TV shows and music compilations. Clothing emblazoned with pop culture references was also common. And several apartment dwellers without yards woke up to discover they had purchased outdoor swimming pools.
Here’s a sample of the other drunk purchases readers made.
“I bought a round trip plane ticket to Montana.”
“I bought a prepaid two week trip to the Vinoy...when I live in DTSP already 🤦”
“A trip to Jamaica."
“Plane tickets so I can leave.”
Clothing and accessories
“Tank top with the narwal from Elf saying, ‘Bye Buddy, I Hope You Find Your Dad.’”
“A plush Snorlax (Pokemon) purse”
“I ultimately didn’t buy it, but I did wake up one morning to find my browsing history was filled with Left Shark Halloween costumes. It was March.”
“Chain mail helmet. Anyone have a suit of armor I can buy next time I get tipsy?”
“Literally just a black 3-hole ski mask”
“A way too expensive for me Gucci purse!”
“A Toucan beak mask”
“These neon sunglasses! (Didn’t buy the dog, that’s Monty adopted from HSTB! #adoptdontshop)”
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“In the mid 90s I apparently bought a CD box set: Top 100 hair band power ballads.”
“A pair of recorders for my fiancee and I. Not voice recorders, like the plastic tooters you’d play ‘Ode to Joy’ on in elementary school.”
“Gaming Laptop and Samsung Galaxy Watch”
“The entire Time-Life Classic Country Collection and Soft Rock in one night at the age of 24..."
“A complete boxed set of MacGyver DVDs.”
“My husband and I ordered Hulk Hogans “Thunder in Paradise” DVD Set...it came in the mail and we had zero clue how it happened, checked amazon and then remembered I was debating with him about how it was great and shot in Disney blah blah blah and he didn’t believe it was a real thing. Now we are proud owners of the dvd set!”
Home goods and decor
“I accidentally ordered 64 laundry baskets one night. I thought I ordered 4 while drunk, then 64 showed up. I started giving them away to neighbors. I called us the titanium handle gang.”
“My best friend who doesn’t have much money purchased a $3,500 outdoor sauna that required an additional $500+ in expenses to place it on a small deck and add electricity. He didn’t even remember purchasing it, until weeks later when he received a reminder notice that they just shipped his sauna. He called and tried to cancel the order but they said it would cost close to $1,000 to ship it back to them, so he decided to keep it. How many people in FLORIDA buy an outdoor sauna?”
“A fog machine”
“A 9 foot tall fire breathing dragon”
“An ant farm"
“1000 ink pens”
“A PINK 70-lb heavy bag and stand. Note I’m 5′1” and I’ve not worked out in over 14 years. I apparently felt very motivated. I don’t even have the ‘new year, new me’ excuse for this because it was nowhere near the new year.”
“My father once bought a 6 foot statue of a giant tortoise. Still has it.”
“Smoke detectors and essential oils...Imagine my surprise when they showed up a few days later. And when the essential oils showed up again in February because I accidentally set up a monthly purchase.”
“A rainbow poop emoji plushie”
Finally, this story from an anonymous Palm Harbor reader illustrated the consequences of buying while buzzed. His account, in his own words:
"My wife and I watched “The Godfather” the night before April Fool’s Day. She recoiled and covered her eyes during the part where the movie producer wakes up and finds the severed head of his prize thoroughbred in his bed.
In my never-ending quest to outdo her with April Fools’ pranks, I had purchased online a severed horse head pillow (after consuming a nice bottle of Francis Coppola Claret cabernet sauvignon) and placed it next to her in the morning.
My back us still sore from sleeping on the living room couch for a week following that stunt."
Lesson learned: Don’t drink and Prime.