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Think your NFL owner is bad? Dan Snyder’s always worse

Do you see Dan Snyder's NFL franchise winning any championships? And don't get us started on that nickname. (Associated Press)
Do you see Dan Snyder's NFL franchise winning any championships? And don't get us started on that nickname. (Associated Press)
Published Nov. 7, 2018|Updated Nov. 7, 2018

Say what you want about the Glazers, who are clearly a root cause of the Bucs' slide toward nothingness over the past 11 seasons.

But the Glazers can step aside this weekend, comforted by the fact that there is someone worse.

In fact, King Rat is coming to town with his Washington team.

That would be Daniel M. Snyder, 53, the iron-clawed Tyrannosaurus owner set down in our nation's capital, not to be confused with the Tyrannosaurus set down on Pennsylvania Avenue, who, years ago, in his own turn as a USFL owner, sank an entire football league. Snyder hasn't turned that trick yet. There's always tomorrow.

Washington is 5-3 this season and leads the NFC East. But no sports enterprise in America wears the mark of the pentagram like the team run by Snyder and his fellow werewolf, former Bucs general manager and H.R. Haldeman wannabe Bruce Allen.

Snyder bought Washington in 1999, but his teams haven't won a championship. Its last playoff win came in 2005 — over the Bucs. But Tampa Bay had won it all in 2002. The Glazers are 171-205 in 24 years of Bucs ownership with 10 winning seasons. Snyder is 137-174-1 with six winnings seasons and two playoff victories.

And we're just getting warmed up.

Understand, it isn't easy being the worst in a billionaire boys club filled with scalawags.

But I'll go with Danny Boy.

Here is the owner who charged fans to get into training camp.

Here is the owner who, after Sept. 11, with a nation mourning, leaped into action and began adding a "security charge" to ticket prices.

Here is the owner who once allowed stadium vendors sell peanuts that were past expiration dates, having once been the property of a defunct airline.

Here is the owner who once sued the team's season ticket holders.

No, Snyder never held a city hostage, as Malcolm Glazer did with a threatened move before Tampa rolled over for stadium funding. But Snyder has just held everything else hostage, including fans, racial sensitivity and humanity.

Here is the tone-deaf owner who still clings to his team's nickname when it clearly has no place in sports or today's America.

"We'll never change the name," Snyder told media five years ago. "It's that simple. NEVER — you can use all caps."

Snyder — and Allen — have been steadfast in their opposition to the name change. These two would dig up Geronimo and stand him in front of the stadium if they could, then sell the shovels as official team merchandise.

Another recent disaster: A New York Times report on claims that Washington used team cheerleaders as escorts on a Costa Rica trip where suite holders and sponsors — males, by chance — were allowed to see cheerleaders topless.

Yes, Dan Snyder always comes up on the wrong side of everything. If Bucs fans think they have a bad deal with the Glazers, they should think again.

Get that weak stuff out of the lane.

Chief Dan Snyder is coming to Tampa Bay.

He's the WORST, all caps.

Contact Martin Fennelly at mfennelly@tampabay.com or (813) 731-8029.